
The Cardinals want to capture the immense publicity of having the Pope as striker for an International Class Football (soccer) team. Father Nicholas is given the task of assembling a team from Popetowns somewhat rag-tag residents. .. as impossible as that may seem.
A group of disabled children are coming to meet the Pope and perform, but the Pope has gone missing (playing hide-and-seek too well). Father Nicholas, in desperation to keep the days activities running seeks out a Pope impersonator. This impersonator is an exact image of the Pope, but unlike the real Pope, who is a young child with a girlie voice, the impersonator is a Jewish man with a Brooklyn/Jew accent. To pull off the scheme, he must be seen but not heard.
The Cardinals are hoping to secure a 'sponsorship deal' with the pending visit of a head of state and his darling wife. Problem is, this head of state is a gun toting dictator, and his only interests are seeing that his wife is pleased, and killing people who displease his wife. Father Nicholas has been given the task of tidying up the Pope prior to their arrival. Pope however has been attempting a record-breaking stint of going unwashed for 3 months!