

Roland is given the job of protecting a valuable diamond in a museum overnight, but Rattfink is hiding inside when the museum closes.
In a satire of WWI films, Roland (of Doveland) and Rattfink (of Hawkland) go to war to defend their own interests of peace and violence.
Rattfink (a weed) continually tries to destroy the peace of Roland (a flower child) who steadfastly refuses to be brought down.

Roland is off to college for the first time at good 'ol P.U. When he gets to his college, the first thing he does is sign up for track. He could not have come at a better time, as the track team needs a runner to rival Rattfink in a track race. Roland and Rattfink now race to represent their beloved colleges.